June 2001

06/19/01: Well, it has begun. This is the first entry into what I hope will be an ongoing journal. Not that anyone might be interested in my little life, but ya never know.

I finally get the server to work tonight and now the webpages are up and running. There's a lot of updating to do and several of them are FAR from complete. Lot's of pictures to come still. The bonsai page is going to be a pain in the ass, but I'll get it done soon I hope. I'm amazed how many people actually stop by and message me from the webcam page. Thanks to all those of you who said "hi". It's great to meet you and I keep making new friends every day.

Of course, I get the "show us your d*ck" requests, but I either have to be really drunk or really horny to go there, so you can take that as a definite maybe as to what you might see on the webcam...Let's just leave it at that.

It's my intention to be as brutally honest here in these pages as I can. Please understand, however, I have the utmost respect for others privacy and I wouldn't, and will never, mention names or enough information about the others in my life to identify them. Unless they say it's okay. But that doesn't mean it can't be juicy, just vague about the people around me, out of respect for them. Other than that, you can expect the same thing my friends get from me. Honesty, sincerity, and openness.

Eventually I'll have my "Past" page done and when I mention things here in the journal, they'll make more sense to you, but until then, just try and follow along.

I just got a call from my new best friend upstate and he cancelled this weekend! DAMN! I reaaaaaaally was looking forward to a trip north for the weekend, but he had some issues and he's special enough to me that I have to respect that. (damndamndamn!) Well, he said he MIGHT change his mind! I can always hope. He's is SUCH a sweetheart!  More on that later

Also met a guy tonight, online from my webcam who seems really nice although a bit mysterious! (sometimes that's a good thing) He's German/American Indian. hmmmmm, I find that VERY intriguing! Well we talked and we'll talk again! We'll just have to see how he does in the curing the incurable romantic department! :)

I, at least wanted to start this tonight and have SOMETHING to read in my journal. Again, after I get the "CHECKERED PAST" page updated, some of the characters and people I refer to here will make much more sense to you, if you're still reading this. Keep in touch and I'll do the same.

06/20/01: What a loooong-ass day! Busy at work, busy at home. I have so much to do trying to get these webpages up and running, and get all the pictures online. I took some new shots at the office today. I still have to get some shots of my boss the Lt. though. She doesn't know it yet, but she better not give me any crap about not wanting her face here! She really is the coolest boss and a great friend too. She is the kind of person you can tell your deep dark secrets to and she'll lend a sympathetic ear.

She usually joins Susie and I in our "man-watching" when we do an office lunch. Which reminds me, we haven't done an "office-outing" in a while! hmmm, time to plan one!

Still no word from my up-north friend on the weekend...<sigh>

I'm not counting on it. I'll just have to see what's cooking on Duval Street this weekend. <another sigh>

I am going to get my "past" page done tomorrow, so you can make some sense of all this ranting and raving. I'm gonna upload this and stop working on the site for now before my eyes fall out of the back of my head!

06/21/01: Finally got started on my "Past" pages, they're not complete, but there's a lot more to read finally. It strange to write so openly and honestly about my past and my life and not have any idea who might read it. Not to mention who might actually have ANY interest in it. But I tried and will keep trying to make it as interesting as possible. I may add to it as I go along because as I'm writing about things in my past I remember more and more stories. It had started out to be a simple little history lesson on Jay Sheldon, it's turning out to be a novel. Well, not THAT long, but as I said, I'm hoping it'll at least be interesting enough to keep your interest! I met a guy last night in my chat room who is also an Internal Affairs investigator, damn another queer cop! We're everywhere! (hehehe) Anyway, he was a very nice guy and since he's not "out" I won't identify him much here, but if you're reading this IA guy, "hi" to you and hopefully the day will come when all department can be as open as mine.

 Oh! Check this out!  Click here  Somebody sent me this in an email. I think it's hilarious! Had to share it with you!

 I still have so much work to do on these pages and tonight I'm going to start taking my bonsai pictures, so that page will be updated soon. Probably tomorrow. Look for it. Tomorrow's FRIDAY! WOO HOO!

The weekend's here!!!!!(almost)

06/22/01: It'sssssssssss FRIDAY!!!!!!! The weekend's here and I'm MORE than ready for it. I had to shut down the webcam for tonight. There's a HUGE thunderstorm heading into Key West and while I have "protection" (hehe) when one of these major summertime thunderstorms come crawling in, they can be really bad. So I don't want to take a chance.

I'm heading out on the prowl i a while, so I'll see ya out there. I think I'll just check out the Bourbon Street Pub tonight or maybe 801 Bar and see what sort of cuties are hanging around. I am supposed to meet some friends there later on, so I'm sure we'll find some trouble to get into.

I met a couple of great guys tonight in my webcam chat room. If you see me online, come on in and chat for a while. I won't bite! "Hey's" to the U.K., Nevada, Ontario, N.Y.C. and everyone else I spoke with tonight, you guys are too much! It was fun meeting you all, and I hope to see you again soon!

I'm hoping to get out to the beach this weekend for some fun and festivities. I'll let ya know!

06/24/01:  Sunday morning and I'm awake at 9 goddamned 30! I MUST be out of my mind! Couldn't sleep. I got in about 5 this morning, (don't ask, but I mostly behaved myself) So I got up and answered a bunch of emails and caught up on things here I've meant to do. Ron and I hung around together last night for most of the evening. He's the most adorable Chinese/Philippino guy. Not to mention built like a brick s********! He's a hottie, and a lot of fun to hang around with. He actually got me into my first straight bar in Key West when I first met him.  I just had this 'thing' about straight bars, and vowed never to go in one. But I LOVE to sing karaoke, and unfortunately there's a VERY limited number of places to sing karaoke down here! Rick's bar (tres straight) has karaoke sometimes.

Well it turns out  Ron also loves karaoke so, having no choice but to break my rule about straight bars ,if I want to sing, we went! It was a blast! and ya know, those straight people aren't so bad after all. No one even tried to "recruit" me! :)~ Ron also has a great voice! Well the karaoke thing was back when we first met and we have since had some great times hanging around, causing trouble, (Like last night).

I talked to Dan last night and he said his boss had been reading through these pages. (woo hoo!) I guess she got a bit of an eye-opening. Anyway, she is apparently a very kewl boss, and said she liked my site a lot. I really have to keep in mind that this stuff just "sticks' my life out there for everyone to see. Although, as I've said, it's my intention to just "lay it all out there" and be honest about things as I can without getting myself or anyone else in trouble. But it always amazes me how many people actually read this stuff.

I have lot's more work to do to update the site and hope to get more done today. One more weekend day then back to the grind! <sigh> I think I'm going to take a break and head out to the pool and see how badly I can burn my butt! With me it's not a question of tanning, it's how burned and or freckled I can get before it fades into some shade other than white (notice I did NOT say brown!) Irish-French-Welsh heritage! Anybody wanna buy a few thousand freckles? cheap!

06/25/01: Did I tell you how much I hate Mondays? Well, I closed out the weekend much the same way as it began, with a fizzle. I went to t-dance at Atlantic Shores last night. It was great as always, although not very crowded. I think a lot of locals were in Ft.Lauderdale for Pride. I have GOT to get my ass up there one of these years.
Key West Pride was fun this year for me. I actually marched in the parade with L.E.G.A.L. and carried the banner! woo hoo! It really was a good time. I chatted with someone who caught me on the web cam who is actually from Key West. Strange that I meet people from all over the world and very seldom from my own backyard. Anyway, we chatted and he said he might go to t-dance and if he saw me he'd say "hi"....

I'll bet you can guess where this is going.... he never showed up! Oh well, honestly...I was NOT being a slut. I just really do enjoy making new friends LOL! Maybe another day. If you're reading this Steven, I'm still looking forward to meeting you one day soon!

Please do me a favor...remind me that between the hours of say 5:30 and 8 PM I should NEVER answer my telephone. Does EVERY damned telemarketer HAVE to call me when I'm in the middle of updating my website!

Anyway, I'm glad this telemarketer called! It was someone from Bell South offering me a DSL connection. Now I have friends who've had DSL and cable modems. They all say that Cable is the way to go and wins hands down over DSL. Here's my problem, I live in the Florida Keys. We always get everything years after it becomes available to almost everyone else! Hell, we just got indoor plumbing last month! hehehe...anyway, I'm a sucker for a good sales pitch and I figured with my new webcam and website. I might as well give it a try. If you can't tell from the speed and quality of the camarades picture. I'm using a regular old, (ancient) 56K dial up! So sometime in the next week or ten days, I'll get to see myself just how much faster a DSL line is and sometime, hopefully this millennium, I might actually get the chance to try a cable modem too! I hope I can afford all this stuff! Lemme see......yup still have checks in the checkbook so it must be okay.

Oh! I almost forgot, my new friend Martin called me! <swoon!> He really is SO cute! I won't tell you much about him at this point since I haven't asked him if he minds that I write about him, but he called because he was having some trouble with a class he's in and I think he just wanted to "vent". I'm so glad he thought of me to call when he need to do that! By the way, he has a boyfriend (damn-it!).

I've had my eye on this guy since I first moved down here (Hey! a guy can window shop!) and I've finally met him. (and yes, in spite of the fact that I'm so damned shy, I told him I thought he was cute!) It turns out that he's not only VERY cute, but he's also a real sweetheart of a guy. I'm am so glad I finally met him. More on that later! <smirk>

Oh well, Monday's almost over....It's gotta get better from here!

06/26/01:  I just had the most incredible evening! Oh...my day? It was okay. Work was long but interesting. I wish I could talk more about it, but because of the nature of my job, unfortunately, I can't. If or when I DO get the chance or a case is closed and becomes "public information" I'll see what I think you might be interested in (All the juicy stuff, of course!) but I'll warn you, it' will be really limited.

Back to my evening...I had the chance to chat with a bunch of incredible people tonight. They were watching the web cam and popped in to say hello! If you want to know how to really get a hold of me, I find I'm spending much less time in the chat room off of the camarades page and I'm on ICQ mostly. So if you've been in the chat room waiting for me, I'm sorry, it get's crazy here sometimes, but please use ICQ if you have it or my AIM screen name "JaySheldonKW" You'll find me there a lot too.

Just as I was about to sign off for the evening. I got a message from a woman in Osaka, Japan. I'm not sure if she knew I was gay or not, I kind of got the impression she was trying to "find out" more about me. but it didn't matter. We talked for a while, I told her all about my love of Japan and how, one day I will get myself over there! She said she like the website, so I'm guessing she MUST know about me, but she sent me a very sexy picture anyway! Oh well. She was sweet!

NOW for the BIG news of the day... I'm going to Tampa this weekend to visit Dan. Now I know what you're thinking, because I've heard form some of you on this topic, and before you get any ideas... I'm not thinking about some big romantic reunion or anything.
Dan and I are the very best of friends and I hope will always stay that way. As I told you somewhere else in these pages. I spend 6 months creating a little "gift" for him. (yeah, I know, but when I get creative, I GET CREATIVE!) and it is very special to me so there's NO way I'm gonna just snail mail it to him. I've told you I'm a hopeless romantic, I HAVE to hand this to him in person. It's taken me a long time to put it together and after all this work, I need to hand it to him. After this weekend, I'll be able to tell you more about it, but since I know he reads this page in particular (don't you?) I don't want to "spill the beans" I'll explain it on Monday and if I get real ballsy, I might even put a piece of it here on the site.

Oh, by the way.... I don't care if it's not politically correct in all the right circles to like this movie, but I finally got the chance to watch The Broken Hearts Club (stars Dean Cain, John Mahoney, among others)  about 2 months ago. It quickly became one of my ALL TIME favorite movies. It is incredible! I'm going to write more about it on a "favorites" page still to come. But I've been suggesting to Dan (and nearly anyone else who'll listen) that he see this movie! I promised him he'd laugh like hell and cry like hell too! He finally rented it and watched it with his best friend and a certified "fag-hag" Roxy. I was right! They BOTH loved it! Laughed-cried and everything in between. Again, if you've never seen it WATCH IT! I guarantee you will find someone in there you can identify with and ALL your friends will be represented in one way or another! (That is, if you're gay or have gay friends).  And if you're straight, but not narrow, you'll love it too!

I really am looking forward to this trip, I haven't spent any real time with Dan in a while. It will be fun. I'll give you ALL the gory details on Monday...stay tuned!

Rico-you're NUTZ!     Carlos-you're a sweetie!       David-I really hope your date went well tonight!            Hyper1972-I'm STILL not taking the rest of my clothes off!

06/27/01: This has been the strangest week! I have been confused over which day of the week it was ALL week long! On Monday I thought it was Tuesday, all day yesterday I thought it was Monday and I don't remember what the hell today is! hmmmmm, I must be premenstrual or something! OF course, looking forward to the weekend might have something to do with it! I spoke with my Orlando friend tonight and he's doing well, STILL can't get a straight  (excuse the expression) answer out of him about us spending some time together. Maybe I'm just going about this the wrong way. Maybe I need to take the "bull" by the horns and stop being so damned nice, but honestly, it just isn't me to not be considerate of other peoples' feelings and, since I'm a major "pleaser" (that's PL-easer), it just isn't me, not to consider someone else's feelings. I want to spend a LOT more time with him, and he is so busy with his hectic schedule events going on in his life that are very stressful right now, and family things, that we can hardly EVER sync our lives so we get to see each other. I really think he wants to, and I KNOW I do, but schedules and distances being what they are...
Well, if it was meant to happen, it'll happen, I'll just "enjoy the ride" we're good friends, we get along very well when we DO get the chance to see each other, and anything else will wait. The Japanese have a saying that I love and it VERY much fits here: "Shi kata ga nai!" It really doesn't translate well into ENglish, but the closest I can explain it is, "That's just the way it is" or "It can not be helped"   I think you know what I'm trying to say.

Oh my god! How could I forget to tell you this?! I'm sitting in my office today talking with Susie and I'm leaning back in my chair, when suddenly Susie yells "I got it!" (I was hoping it wasn't some tropical jungle disease) but she went on to say that she has been bothered by WHO I reminded her of ever since she's known me and she couldn't think of who it was. Well, just as I was  sitting there, talking and smiling, it hit her. She turns to me and says, "You know what? You remind me of.....Mel Gibson!"
Now don't get me wrong, there was a time when I would have drank Mel's bathwater, he's cute and all, but I just don't think he's aging well, (have you seen him lately?) Anyway, I AM flattered to have been compared to him, I disagree with my best friend Susie, but,....isn't it nice to have someone who'll pump you up with that kind of bullsh*t? hehehe! Now you see why we're such good friends?

I put a couple new pictures on my "Friends" pages tonight, I finally got a hold of them to make sure it was okay. Damn! Some of these guys must think I have thousands of hits an hour, they way they were so nervous about having their pictures on the page! Honestly though, If you check out the "Friends" page, you'll see links on some of the pictures that will let you send email to them, Please send them a quick note and let them know you were there, and BE NICE! They are ALL special and they ALL mean something to me in one way or the other
Remember... they're my friends!
By the way, speaking of that, If you'd like, send ME an email and include your picture, and let me know if it's okay to put YOU up there! I've met a lot of great people through this site in the short time it's been active and I'd love to be able to share that with people too. Just email me!

06/28/01: It's almost like a Friday for me!!! Yeah!!!!!! Since I'm taking most of tomorrow off for my loooooong drive to Tampa .I can't wait. It's been a while since I've seen Dan and I'm really looking forward to it.

I spent last night trying to decide on regular WebCam software. I want to run the camera directly off of my pages instead of, or in addition to the Camarades site. It's a pain but I'm working on it, so keep an eye on the WEBCAM page for details. If you have any suggestions email me.

What a day! We finally had another I.A. office lunchtime outing! Eating, laughing, man-watching. It's getting to be "off-season" down here so the man-watching is limited, but we DID manage to drool over some hotties! Cindy, Susie and I went to PT's Late Night which is a great little restaurant here in Key West. Great food and not really expensive. Luis was out on some butch S.W.A.T. training or something so he couldn't complete the team lunch. I had my eye on one cutie sitting at the table next to us, <woo hoo> he had those "KILLER" eyes that just burn holes in your soul! But, alas, he was more interested in eating than flirting, besides I think he was more interested in Cindy and Susie than me! damndamndamn! Remind me not to go to lunch with good looking women, would you?! I can't take the competition! hahaha!

Oh, listen, you won't find any updates, for those of you who read this regularly. I've talked to a lot of people who say they've been following my sorted life through these writings and I wanted to let you know. I'm obviously not going to be here until sometime Sunday. So the webcam and this journal won't be updating until then. I PROMISE, I'll give you ALL the details of my weekend. Well, most of them, when I get back. I 'll fill you in on the details of my little "gift" then too. I'm off to pack! Wish me luck! and YOU have a great weekend too!